Here are some questions that others have asked Dr. Burkham:
(questions 71 - 75 of 126 total)
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Friday, July 20, 2007
janet writes:
Hello,
My therpist is closing her practice and I am heart sick about this. We have been doing very intense trauma work. She has done a beautiful job of guiding me through this process. I have interviewed several therapist and nothing really clicks. I feel uncomfortable and anxious about the changes. My previous therapist (prior to the one who is leaving) beytrayed me and our work. I don't feel much trust trying to find someone to work with again. I know I am not finsihed with this work and I resent the need to start again.
Any suggestions on how I can help myself and not feel like I am losing important ground. I am frightened and I also feel relieved that the process of saying goodbye to my therapist is now over.
Janet
Dear Janet: I guess the good news is that you have made some significant progress although it is very disappointing and scary to have to start again with another therapist. You have gotten past your previous therapist who betrayed you and you went on to do some significant healing so that is a sign to me that you can get past your current frustration and anger and find another therapist to help. I would keep looking for another therapist until you find one that feels right. I've got a chapter in my book about therapists, 'The Good, the Bad and the Overly Helpful' that could help guide you. If you persevere, you will find away. All the best!
Dr. Rob Burkham
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Mary writes:
Dr.Burkman, Hi I just want to let you know I have found a new Dr. (I did not know how hard it was to find one who does meds & therapy) I was very upset about having to go to a therapist & then go through it again with a psychiatrist. And one place even wanted me to see a nurse practitioner 1st then therapist and then the psychiatrist. I have a real hard time letting my dirty laundry out to a bunch of people. I am not sure why he has not just referred me to someone else instead of me having this meltdown. Any way I still think he has shown a bad influence, by giving up on his practice & patients. I guess you Doctors are really just like us, just a little more educated. Also I am sure it was not him I was attracted to it was the therapy, that is a good feeling. (hell I am very happily married!!) Just want to thank you for responding so quickly. It really helped. Mary
Dear Mary: It sounds like you have done some good work to move on and find another psychiatrist. A thought on your comment that 'Doctors are really just like us, just a little more educated': it's true, professionals can treat people poorly just like everyone and sometimes it's hard to find one who will be competent and treat you well. I hope you have found one and that you can continue to make progress. I'm glad I could help.
Dr. Rob Burkham
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Mary writes:
Dr. Burkham, I wrote a few days ago, about being too dependent on my Dr. Well I have been thinking and now I am thinking he is quiting on me! (closing practice $$ problems) Well the way I see it I am a hairdresser and if I was to up and leave my clients they would be very upset, like I am pretty much. I would want to help them find someone else. Why isn't he helping me more. I am seeing him 3 times this month casue I am so upset, I only see him once a month regularly. I am having my last visit next week.(i have been think a lot about this) Well now I want to go in there and give him hell, just like he gave me when I quit my job. He is pretty much doing the same thing, giving up on his practice & clients. Now I think everything he has taught me (in the last 4 years)is just bull##@@##. I don't know where to start to find a new therapist. I don't know what else to say except I am very worried & scared I will fall back deeper in my depression & anxiety... Mary
Dear Mary: Your second message is alot angrier than the first! Your anger makes alot of sense but it will hurt you if you let it fester rather than having it motivate you to find another therapist and get on with making the changes you need to. I wish you the best.
Dr. Rob Burkham
Monday, July 16, 2007
Mary writes:
I have social disorder anxiety & depression. Also have a lot of health problems. My concern is, my psychiatrist is great he has helped me with a lot over the last few years 4 to be exact. He is closing his practice & I am freaking out. Can not eat sleep or be happy, I am looking for a new one, but it is hard I am so upset. And I don't like this it makes me think I might be in love with him or is this just a dependent patient who needs a change anyway. I am to embarrassed to talk about this to him. I still have 2 more visits. Please help I am so mixed up.
Dear Mary:
It's great that your psychiatrist has helped you so much--the bad news is that you are scared and depressed about being ok without him. I realize you're embarrassed to talk to him about your fears, but I think that could be very helpful if you were to do that. If he handles things well, you will learn more about yourself and see that you do have the strength to move forward without him. Also, he can be very sure that he refers you to someone who will be most helpful to you in ongoing treatment. Remember, therapists are trained to help people with thoughts that are charged with difficult emotions. So talk to him and continue to seek out the help that you need to keep making progress.
Best of luck!
Dr. Rob Burkham
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Mary writes:
Hi Dr. Burkham...I have been struggling with depression since I was a teenager ( I am currently 41). Over the years it seems to have been getting worse. I was taken off all my meds as the doctor thought it was masking the true feelings I was experiencing. I am in therapy with a counsellor and also see a psychiatrist. I don't feel like I am getting any relief. I am having a lot of difficulties holding down my job as sometimes I can't get myself out of bed in the mornings. I am feeling so discouraged. I just want it all to go away. I don't have a lot of support outside of my counsellor and psychiatrist and feel all alone with this. I can't talk to family about this. A part of me feels so desperate that I just want to give up the fight...I don't have the energy to do it anymore.
But there is a small part that wants to fight. Any suggestions of getting some relief? I appreciate any advice you have...Thanks in advance.
Dear Mary:
I'm glad you have that small part of you that wants to fight--that's the part that can keep you going through the hard times and lead you to a better life. First, we should deal with the medication issue: going off medication may have hurt you and it may be important to see another doctor for another opinion. Anti-depressants don't 'mask' your true feelings--when they work, they help you think more positively and have more motivation. So I would seriously consider another opinion and getting on an anti-depressant that works for you.
Second, I'd talk to your counsellor about how you don't feel you're getting any better and ask for some specific things you can do to get yourself going. Often, planning and doing some small activities which you have found pleasurable in the past can help to get you going and help you start seeing the good things in life. It may be hard, but if you can be good to yourself in small ways, you can begin to feel better.
Best of luck and let me know how things go!
Dr. Rob Burkham
(questions 71 - 75 of 126 total)
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